© 2017 Michael
Swickard, Ph.D. One
morning in my coffee shop, we convened our own Chamber of Commerce. Business
has been slow in our little slice of heaven so we needed to come up with some
ways to induce folks to come and spend dollars.
We really
didn’t want lots of people to move here and clog up the roads and stores.
Rather, we would like people to come, spend money and then go home.
I took out
a piece of paper to jot down ideas. One person said that the way to make money
was to have all sorts of festivals such that out-of-towners came and spread
cash around.
I
mentioned that Roswell had the Aliens Festival. We pondered that moneymaker. When
I mentioned to one of the leading citizens in Roswell that the alien story was
suspect, he said, “But they bring hundred-dollar bills.” Then he smirked.
Many years
ago I wrote a column about that Roswell Smirk. We could have that smirk if we could
just invent a good festival.
First,
there could be Dust Day in March and April. Southern New Mexico is noted for
the dust storms, maybe we could get people to come. Probably not. I have
thought that instead of a Rain Meter, I should invent a Dust Meter. After a
two-day windstorm, it would show 1.3 inches of dust was in the air.
We were
going well and the ideas flowed like coffee. There was Waffle Days on the first
Tuesday of November to coincide with the elections. The agricultural members
offered: Pig Days, Chicken Days, Cow Days, Goat Days… the group paused.
From one
table over a vegetarian offered Tofu Days which was followed by Road-Kill Days.
No interest in either. More practical was Rusty Old Cars Days, Bow Tie Days,
Halitosis Days which brought out Onion Days.
Two months
of every year about fifty percent of the onions consumed in our country come
from Southern New Mexico. That festival could be sponsored by one of the many
mouthwash companies.
Horned
Toad Days were offered along with Siesta Days. I was in favor of that. I have
never been disappointed in a good old afternoon nap. There was Nothing Much
Happening Days but that didn’t get a second.
One of the
coffee drinkers pointed out, “We don’t need days, we need nights for festivals.
During the days, we are all working other than our coffee breaks.”
That
caused the conversation to slow down because one person pointed out that having
something at night was fine as long as they could get home by nine, which is
their bedtime. There was an early to bed, early to rise comment which we all
knew was true.
Let us
reason together as to more festivals in our area to pick up any stray tourist
dollars. Send me via this news outlet your ideas.
Something
like Geezer and Geezerette Days might just be the money ticket. I would fit in.
Consider that the fifty-yard amble could make the evening news.
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